Relationships (Part 2 of 2)
(Continued from Relationships)It is also important to keep a sense of humor. Don't fill your partner's day with complaints, whining and pleas for attention. You are there to please your partner, not overwhelm him or her with problems that he or she can't possibly solve for you...
A commitment between two people means that you are pledging to spend your time, space, company and life together. Often relationships collapse because one partner is putting more effort into it than the other. Make sure that the balance of who pays attention to whom is fair and equal.
Acknowledge that you and your partner are not Siamese twins and that you are bound to have separate biorhythms, interests, hobbies, feelings and opinions of things. Be empathetic and sympathetic and don't take it personally if your partner requires space. Trying to force your opinions, tastes or identity on another person is called codependency.
Suffering separation anxiety because the other person decides to go shopping without you means you need to see a therapist. Some people imagine that their partner as being kind of a third leg or as joined to the hip. There is such a thing as smothering your partner with jealousy and anxiety.
Resist the temptation to put your new partner on a pedestal or idealize him or her. This is dehumanizing and sets you both up for a big disappointment. Be reasonable in your expectations of him or her and take setbacks in your stride. Love is about acceptance, not trying to change the person you love into a more perfect version.
They say that sex is the glue that holds most relationships together. If that is true, the instruction for holding your own relationship together is obvious.
Lack of variety, routine, stress and overwork can all lead to apathy and disinterest in romance. Use your imagination, spontaneity and creativity to keep your romance as physically intimate and exciting as it was the day you first met!
Affectionate is also another important component as a relationship. Every day make sure you kiss your partner good bye before he or she leaves to go to work. And that old cliche is true. Make it a rule to never, ever go to bed angry with each other.
Just because the dating phase of your relationship is over, doesn't mean that you stop going out on dates. Plan exciting ventures for yourself such as picnics in the park, dinners out and trips to favorite romantic places.
Making time for your relationship is essential. What we make a priority in our lives seems to thrive and endure with us the longest so be ready to make compromises that put your partner first.
Don't see this as a sacrifice, but part of the hard work that is need to make your relationship blossom for a very long time!